I'm a bad mom.
Was that the right decision?
What if something bad happens?
I don't know how I'm going to get through this.
My baby deserves better.
What is wrong with me?
Am I doing this right?
Why is this so hard for me?
They would be better off if I wasn't here.
I'm failing.
Will I ever sleep again?
Maybe I wasn't meant to be a mom.
I have no idea what I'm doing.
This isn't what I expected.
I don't know who I am anymore.
The nonstop overwhelm, fear, and guilt about making sure you’re “doing it right” is drowning out the excitement and joy of this season in your life because the anxious thoughts just never stop
The day-to-day reality of being a parent is not at all what you expected. You're miserable, to the point that sometimes you think you made a huge mistake or you fantasize about running away, but you're too ashamed to admit these feelings because what kind of mom has those sort of thoughts??
Something traumatic happened during your labor/delivery... or breastfeeding didn't go the way you planned, and now you can't stop thinking about it or you can't let yourself think about because it was so upsetting. You thought you'd feel better with time, but the disappointment, sadness, or anger is still just bubbling under the surface and you can't stop thinking that your body completely failed you.
Sound familiar?
relate better to memes?
I've got you covered
You have a really fussy, colicky, or difficult-to-soothe baby, and having to constantly hold them or spend hours nursing, rocking, or bouncing them every day and night has you so exhausted you think you might actually be on the verge of a mental breakdown and you're terrified you might "snap" and actually hurt the baby.
Sound familiar?
do you like memes?
maybe you'll relate best to one of these
The nonstop overwhelm, fear, and guilt about making sure you’re “doing it right” is drowning out the excitement and joy of this season in your life because the anxious thoughts just never stop
The day-to-day reality of being a parent is not at all what you expected. You're miserable, to the point that sometimes you think you made a huge mistake or you fantasize about running away, but you're too ashamed to admit these feelings because what kind of mom has those sort of thoughts??
Something traumatic happened during your labor/delivery... or breastfeeding didn't go the way you planned, and now you can't stop thinking about it or you can't let yourself think about because it was so upsetting. You thought you'd feel better with time, but the disappointment, sadness, or anger is still just bubbling under the surface and you can't stop thinking that your body completely failed you.
You have a really fussy, colicky, or difficult-to-soothe baby, and having to constantly hold them or spend hours nursing, rocking, or bouncing them every day and night has you so exhausted you think you might actually be on the verge of a mental breakdown and you're terrified you might "snap" and actually hurt the baby.
You're so lonely. You try to spend time with your friends but it's so much harder to schedule with a baby, and when you do get together you end up comparing yourself to them and feeling worse about how you're parenting and what your life looks like right now.
You feel so disconnected from your partner. They don't understand what you're going through or what you need. Your communication has been reduced to talking about baby logistics or arguing about anything and everything.
You plaster on a smile for your co-workers and say what you think they want to hear, but being a working mom is tearing you apart and you don't know how anyone possibly finds a balance.
You don't recognize yourself and feel trapped in a hazy place that doesn't make any sense.
Your confidence (if you even had any to begin with) has been utterly shaken. You are completely doubting your abilities as a mom.
What if you could...
Learn to trust and love your body again
Reconnect with your intuition and its wisdom and guidance to be able to trust yourself when making decisions about how you want to parent
Ask for and actually get the support you need
All of this is possible with therapy
Feel empowered and confident about any future challenges motherhood may bring
Welcome your fears as (sometimes admittedly overzealous) efforts to protect yourself and your baby, learning to sort out which are productive and helpful… and when (and how) to let the rest go
share your birth story and express your emotions without fear of being judged or dismissed
learn practical ways to cope with or contain difficult feelings or distressing thoughts
Together we'll work on:
build your tolerance to give space for and sit with all your and your baby's emotions
strengthen connection with your partner, deciding how you want to work together as teammates in parenting
schedule your free 15-minute consultation to learn if Ifs-informed emdr is right for you
*Postpartum experiences are often complicated by trauma. You may have a history of trauma that is now impacting your sense of self as a parent (such as abuse, neglect, and other traumas in childhood or adolescence). Or maybe your trauma occurred as part of your journey to becoming a parent (such as fertility challenges, pregnancy or infant loss, and traumatic birth experiences). Or you may have experienced something traumatic after your child was born that has shaken your confidence as a parent.... (such as NICU or PICU stays, or serious illness or injury.) These and any other traumas complicating your healing can be addressed with IFS-Informed EMDR.
What is IFS-Informed EMDR?
EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. IFS stands for Internal Family Systems.
Both EMDR and IFS are evidence-based therapies for treating trauma. IFS-Informed EMDR integrates the two, changing the underlying negative core beliefs that are causing emotional and relational problems in a way that collaborates with our natural psychological defenses rather than trying to just push past them.
This process completely transforms how you view yourself, others, and the world, making it possible to experience true healing and lasting change.
let go of any misplaced blame or guilt over things you cannot control
validating the past
Building A new Future
coping with the present
honor and grieve the loss of the life you had before becoming a mom
reconnect with old (or find or new) hobbies & social supports
learn how to evaluate your fears for what is helpful/ useful, and how to challenge fears that are unproductive or irrational
process traumatic experiences*
gain clarity on what kind of mom you want to be and how you want to parent in accordance with your values and needs
Every new mom’s actual postpartum experience usually doesn’t line up with what she expected or hoped for, but therapy is a safe space to process whatever yours may look like.
therapy can address the thoughts and feelings you have about all kinds of postpartum Challenges:
• Postpartum Anxiety or OCD
• Postpartum Depression
• Had a High Risk Pregnancy
• NICU/PICU Stays
• History of Infertility
• Prior Pregnancy/Infant Loss
• Birth Trauma
• Postpartum Insomnia
• Balancing Motherhood and Work
• Setting Boundaries with Family
• History of Childhood Abuse/Neglect
• History of Sexual Assault/Rape
• Infant Feeding/Sleep Issues
• Body Image Negativity
• Identity Transformation
• Conflict with Partner
Therapy with me is unique because not only am I an expert in perinatal mental health, but I'm also an expert in infant feeding, sleep, and development.
How well your baby is eating and sleeping can have a huge impact on your mental health:
Before I started my graduate program to become a therapist, I worked for several years as an infant nanny, and then I supported myself through grad school and my residency by working overnights as a Newborn Care Specialist. I fell in love with it so much that I still support new families in their homes overnight as a NCS and virtually as a trauma-informed infant sleep consultant alongside my therapy practice.
I am passionate about helping new parents and other postpartum professionals to understand just how much infant feeding and sleep impacts maternal mental health...and vice versa... and why it's so important for the wellness of moms and babies to be supporting new families in both of these areas.
Optimal Infant Development
Optimal Maternal Mental Health
- Maybe you're dealing with the stress of low milk supply, painful nursing, triple feedings, D-MER, mastitis, or issues with poor weight gain
- Maybe you are grieving being unable to feed the way you planned
- Maybe your baby has their days and nights mixed up or won't sleep without being held, and you have become so sleep deprived it feels like you're starting to lose your mind
Your mental health also impacts how well things are going with your baby's feedings and sleep, which then has a direct impact on their growth and development:
- Maybe you are dealing with postpartum depression and are struggling to stick to any kind of consistent routine for you and the baby or to find routines you actually enjoy
- Maybe you are experiencing intrusive thoughts or obsessions related to fears about SIDS, contaminated formula, or how much milk baby is getting that are causing unhelpful compulsive behaviors or paralysis when trying to making decisions
- Maybe you have postpartum PTSD, and your baby's crying is such a trigger that you haven't been able to follow through with your goals for getting your baby to nap in their crib or to sleep through the night
I deeply understand the nitty gritty reality of caring for a baby, and how confusing it can feel to wonder, "Am I depressed or am I just exhausted?" or "Do I just have a difficult, fussy baby or is there something wrong with me that is making this feel so hard?"
Therapy with me can help you tease that out and find the right solution to your struggles, whether that's helping you change or resolve something about your baby's feeding, sleep, routines, or behavior...or helping clarify what to expect at different developmental stages with your baby and learning effective ways to cope with the normal challenges of parenting... or helping you to heal from traumatic experiences that have negatively colored your thinking and emotional responses so you can tap back into your innate wisdom and be free to connect with your baby in new ways.
- Treat yourself with gentleness and compassion in this season of huge changes and continual growth (for you and your baby)
- Feel more like yourself again
- Establish and find peace in routines that work for you and your baby
- Be filled with courage and faith alongside any fears and uncertainty
- (Re)connect with your intuition to know what’s best for your baby
- Offer the very best version of yourself to your little one
If you’re ready, then I am confident that together we can help you to feel like a renewed momma - well-rested and confident in continuing your parenting journey.
Being a mom is fucking hard.
But you can find the strength to not only survive it, but enjoy it.
reach out today to start truly enjoying motherhood
What if you could release your fears and go through each day feeling confident in who you are as a mom?
Schedule your free 15 minute consultation
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
I am interested in therapy services but also have concerns about my baby or child’s sleep - can you help me with that too?
Definitely! If we’re working together in therapy and your child’s sleep is impacting your mental health, then it absolutely makes sense for that to be something we work on! Not only would we explore and process your thoughts and feelings about your/your child’s lack of sleep or struggle to develop a good routine or schedule - just like you would with any other therapist - we’ll also draw on my expertise as a sleep consultant to collaborate on a specific plan to help your child sleep better for both nights and naps.
If you’ve read about my sleep consulting services, you wouldn’t need to purchase one of my programs. We would simply discuss your concerns about your child’s sleep and your goals for sleep training, and then create a plan together for sleep training and how to support your mental health throughout that process - all during our therapy sessions. If needed, and if my schedule allows, we can also schedule multiple sessions in a week for a few weeks in order to help you make progress more quickly. I would still provide you with any guides/PDFs I’ve created that are relevant to your situation, and you would be able to email or text me between sessions with quick questions like all my therapy clients.
The other key differences between working on sleep issues in therapy rather than as part of a sleep consulting program is that you would not have access to voice/message support via Voxer (it is not a HIPAA-compliant method of communication) or to the Facebook group for follow-up support (this form of social media engagement violates my code of ethics as a therapist).
No, I am not a medical doctor. However, I am able to help get you connected to a prescriber, help you prepare for your initial and subsequent appointments in terms of important information to share and what questions to ask, and I can offer guidance on what to expect with various types of medications.
Contact
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